a i s h a h i z h e r e

I’m feeling like to get away from all of these nonsense! How could i feel so hurt, betrayed and tired when others just dont think of it, what more feel it?

Am I too sensitive..even a small slight thing can hurt me much? Am I too fragile?

I guess I am strong, well it seems I am wrong. I’ve said many-many times that I am strong, I have to be strong, I can be strong..when at the same time peeps around know that I am just a bit stronger than the fish bone…to be specified, a fried-fish bone…

Argh, I think I just can’t take it anymore, how about a transfer? To the east-coast state branch? So that I can get away from him? Heh. That would make me look weaker…I have to be strong…I can’t run away from problems, can’t I? I have to stay and try to solve the problems, whatever they are…

Uncertainty is the most certain thing? I just don’t understand!

The boss said, "I was at the VV on Sunday and I’ve witnessed an unexpected thing. I saw you, walking with a girl…" as he pointed to my officemate. 

I guess he felt like to tell both of us about his discovery. Yeah, he thought that the officemate and I had someting, such a fling-fling…whatever.

So I said "A girl eh? No wonder…"

A day earlier.

I remembered I invited him to have dinner with me thru a text message on the night before (I guess it’s when he was having dinner with the girl). 

So when I was about to go home on that day, he asked me "I thought we are having dinner together today?"  So I invited him to have dinner with me at the VV and he said, "I was there before. Boring…"

"Nevermind…you didn’t reply me. So I thought I’ve got to plan for a back up, so I am having dinner with my girlfriends. By the way, you were there before, I guess we’re up for next time…."

Back to the day of the conversation with the boss.

The boss said again, as in trial to calm me down.."But I think, she’s not his girlfriend. They were walking and keeping the distance so far…He’s leaving her behind…"

The officemate said…"I’ve got to cover…"

So I think, What is he trying to cover? Hmmm…

The boss then said, as he stand up to walk away from us…"I left it to the two of you. Do whatever…Be it to fight or whatever…settle the thing down…"

So I think again…What’s left to get settled?

Sudah terang lagi bersuluh.

I like reading books. I’d like to share a book that I currently in love with.

For one more day-Mitch Albom

Macam biasa, karya Mitch Albom, sangat menekankan kasih sayang dan kekeluargaan.

Cerita ni berkisah mengenai Charley Chick Benetto…once a baseballer yang sangat menyerlah semasa zaman muda dia. Disebabkan minat dalam sukan baseball yang sangat mendalam, Chick sanggup berhenti belajar dan mengikut nasihat ayah dia dengan menyertai team pro untuk bermain dalam some sort of sport liga.

Selepas berhenti sebagai baseballer, Chick bekerja sebagai sales oficer..yang memang tidak kena dengan jiwa dia. Success was not always on his side, Chick rasa tertekan, started drinking…dan mula mengabaikan keluarganya…

Wife Chick meninggalkannya dan Chick semakin tertampar bila his only daughter, Maria, tidak menjemput beliau ke majlis perkahwinannya.

Chick mengambil keputusan untuk take his own life (bunuh diri)…dan dia mengambil keputusan untuk kembali ke Pepperville Beach (his hometown) because he decided to end his life where he started it.

He’s got into an accident, but when he woke up to escape to his home, he was shocked to see that his mother, who died 8 years earlier, was there. So many things happened from the time he reached his home that night, most of them was priceless moment with his mother.

These moment made Chick realized that there’s so much more to life, and there’s never too late to fix relationship with the families. Chick got to know many things about his father (who left the family when he’s about 9-11 years old).

Chick later woke up to find that he’s lying on the road (accident’s site) and he recovered to enjoy and to redeem his life, his time with families.

It was a good reading. Mitch Albom…

Albom, by the way got two movies already on screen. Hallmark. The five people you meet in heaven and Tuesdays with Morrie.

ada orang tu kan..dia tak leh nak cover langsung la kesalahan dia. anyway, nasib la kan aku dah kenal dia dan rapat ngan dia…bila aku tanya something, yang dia ingat tak nak bagitau aku la kononnya nak berdalih la…heheh dari muka dia pun aku tau dia dah serba salah. hmmmm.

i tell you what dear, u dont have to keep anything from me. because sooner or later i will know things anyway. heheh. by the way, it is always nice having you around.

tapi tetap ada di fikiranku…apa yang dia fikir when he once decided to stay out of my life? it was sad.

but, i learned to take things as they come. (rezeki jangan ditolak, musuh jangan dicarik..)

i am happy right now. betul jugak apa yang zoro pernah cakap. things are better left unsaid. kalau tahu pun mungkin akan menyedihkan hati so better tak tahu.

I hope i am living a real life, maksudnya tak der tipu-tipu lagi. tak best dan tak suka!

Oh ya…nak tengok transformers! Sape2 nak tengok ngan aku? Jom!

Balik kampung…okay je lah. Best dapat tengok adik2 n nenet. hehe.